Did you know I am a minister? I am, thanks to some online free ministry thing. I’ve even done a wedding before. And yes, it was valid and everything. They’ve been married for a few years now.

Anyways, in the info they make you fill out they ask for your church affiliation and since I am an atheist in a hardcore fashion (but don’t worry- I don’t judge) I put myself as a minister of The Church of Cartman. As in, you know, Eric Cartman.

I need to frame that certificate ASAP. Hilarity.