You guys:
This is important.
I met a girl through twitter. Her twitter name is @mmarzipan & her website is HERE.
She is doing something very important- and that is spreading the importance of LOVING YOURSELF & YOUR BODY.
I’m not anywhere NEAR close to perfect. I am large. (but, possibly in charge?) I have awful stretch marks from a twin pregnancy directly after a singleton pregnancy. I quite literally have a stomach that could now be described as “a bowl full of jelly”. I’ve never been THERE before. I’ve been big, small, and everywhere in between. But honestly- I’ve never stopped loving myself & being pretty comfortable in my own skin.
And being comfortable in your own skin is SO IMPORTANT. Whatever you look like: Small, big, tall, short. Every. Single. Person. is unique & beautiful. Some, more obviously & mainstreamly than others. But you know what? Let that not take away from the fact that YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL.
I find this plight to be especially important now that I have a daughter. I have ALREADY found myself feeding into horrible self image for my daughter. I have worried about RIDICULOUS things. Is she too hairy? Why does she have those little white bumps on her nose? Is it weird she’s bigger than her brother & not the cute little frail one? Why are her feet so big? What if her stork bites don’t fade?
I mean SERIOUSLY. I have thought those things. I HAVE SAID THEM ALOUD. IN FRONT OF PEOPLE. This, makes me an asshole. But, it also makes me want to work on what is obviously a problem.
Women don’t love themselves enough. I’m not 100% comfortable all the time- but if you know me personally you know I have more self esteem then probably any girl I’ve ever met. And even with all this confidence- I am ALREADY tearing down my poor helpless 7 week old daughter. Why!?! I’m kinda thinking it has to do with the fact that I am 50% of my children’s genetic make-up & it’s hard to see YOUR biggest hang-ups- body size, skin problems, straight up unibrow on your helpless daughter & not feel responsible. But, of course those aren’t her hang-ups. They are YOURS. Well, MINE.
Mara’s website has really helped me to think about how I want to help my children see the world & themselves. I have been really honest about my feelings here- and I don’t want anyone to hate me for it. But, the reason I am saying this all aloud to the internets is because it’s stopping here. My children are PERFECT. All children are PERFECT. I’M PERFECT. Because we are all perfectly OURSELVES. No one is like us & that makes us all so beautiful & wonderful & special.
Please visit Mara’s site & steal one of her “Body Image Warrior” badges for your blog. It is important that even if your self love is a work in progress that you at least put a reminder in your daily life & in the life of your readers that we are all amazing.
<3
April 21st, 2010 - 7:55 AM
This is a really fantastic post. And you’re not an asshole – you’re a human. (But it did make me laugh when you called yourself an asshole.)
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April 21st, 2010 - 8:07 AM
Love this post!!!!
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April 21st, 2010 - 9:03 AM
Great post. I will have to check out that website when I have time to really read it over good.
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April 21st, 2010 - 9:20 AM
I was doing a survey on the history of female identity in college and something discussed was how women have the mentality that they have a body when really we are a body. Owning it makes a huge difference.
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April 21st, 2010 - 11:10 AM
thanks for writing this. I do this too. I’m sure we all do but we are afraid to admit it. This is why I love blogging – its so honest.
Anyway, thanks!
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April 22nd, 2010 - 6:44 AM
Considering I just wrote a whole body image post yesterday about how terrified I am of what my body is going to look like after I give birth, it’s only fitting that I saw this post today.
For sure checking out Mara’s website and doing my best to remind myself every day to find the beauty and perfection in my body.
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April 22nd, 2010 - 10:07 AM
I love this. I’m so happy you linked her site and chose to write so honestly and open.
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April 22nd, 2010 - 10:46 AM
I wrote something similar a couple of weeks ago. It’s so important to send a positive message to our children, especially our daughters! Rock on, you look fab. Great message.
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April 22nd, 2010 - 2:23 PM
I totally get this. It’s so much different after you ahve a daughter I think too, because you start thinking about it from the other side and how you want her to feel as she grows… Great post.
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April 22nd, 2010 - 3:25 PM
Sometimes I beat myself up over what I look like. Then I think about the most AMAZING thing my body did in the past year. I GREW TWO HUMANS!!!! My body can look like whatever it wants after that amazing feat.
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April 22nd, 2010 - 7:42 PM
Em,
This was an amazing post! I love your ability to say to people “This is who I am, I don’t care if you don’t like it!” I really admire your honesty in everything that you write and this one was no exception! I honestly teared up a little. Thank you!
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April 25th, 2010 - 5:46 AM
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