Truman.

Sometimes I feel so guilty about you. You are my middle child, beating your sister by only two minutes. And though I WANTED Sawyer to be the youngest because there is something about having two older brothers for protection that I loved, I feel like you are missing so many things. From clothes that have never been worn to the fact that you often get pushed out of games when Sawyer and Hudson are playing together. It hurts me to think that someday you may feel slighted.

Crazy lady mommy guilt? Maybe.

But I cant shake it off.

So I wanted to tell you how special you are. How beautiful and caring you are. How at 17 month old I know in my heart that though you may look like a Tokarski, you are your father on the inside. I see so many beautiful similarities in your personalities and I know not to mistake your giving nature and quiet demeanor for even the tiniest bit of weakness. You are amazing and strong.

Hudson picks on you because you LET him. Not in the sense that you invite it, but in the sense that if you couldn’t take it- you’d let him know. You are a tenacious learner. I love watching your mind work.  You are introverted and seem content doing your own thing. Though you are quick to cry over hurt feelings, you rarely cry from physical bumps or bruises. Your sensitivity astounds me. Your empathy is beyond your years.

I want you to know how much your smile brightens my day & how much your silly giggle or overenthusiastic “MAMA!” makes me smile.

My mom used to tell me that she loved my brother & I the same- but differently.

I hope you never ever feel any less than loved with all my heart.

-Mommy.

(Parents: If you have more than 1 child, children of similar ages or multiples, how do you balance the time you spend with each child? Especially when another child tends to be needy? …I’m looking at you, Hudson Owen!)