Hilarious.

Hilarious right? But, really- we did get ONE picture where they are all looking at the camera. But let’s be real- they are like American Gothic here. Dead pan.

Oh well. We tried. Merry Christmas.
Love, The Brandts <3

Shit is HILARIOUS. What a great find!!! I bow to Becca for brightening my Friday and sprinkling it with awesome. And reminds me of this old school classic youtube vid:

From the getting low, to the head snake- to the spinning in circles and the incomplete clap. Homeboy is starting to rock out. He even does this belly dancing hip gyration that is hilarious but unfortunately didn’t make it into this particular number. Who knows where he got that move?!

♥

Then, tomorrow I plan to clean downstairs with the hubs and then cross my fat little sausage fingers that I can keep it clean & relax until Wednesday morning. Just for good measure, I’ve hired a cleaning service for Tuesday morning to go over what will hopefully already be done.

Then, Tuesday afternoon- I’m treating myself to a facial. Because let’s be serious- my LAST facial was the day before HUDSON WAS BORN. Funny how taking care of yourself takes SUCH a backseat to being someone’s mommy.

Anyways: two quick tangents here.

A. Hudson completed his 5th night in his room alone. This was the third night he didn’t wake up once, the second night he woke up after 9 AM & the first night we both slept downstairs and let him go at it alone. I am so happy the room seems to be working out. He seems so happy & that makes me feel amazing.

B. This morning- I couldn’t find my kid. I mean, he was in my room with me & all the doors were closed. But I couldn’t see him. I soon discovered he was chasing the cat UNDER THE BED. We have a king size bed and it’s a platform style- probably about 10” (if that) of clearance underneath. Hudson crawled from my husband’s side to mine. It was hilarious & he seemed to be having fun even though I was sort of freaking out since I can’t lay on my tummy or reach in the middle of the bed or pick up the bed if it was needed. But he escaped and seemed to have fun. Hilarious.

I guess that’s it for now! Everyone enjoy the weekend. Hopefully, you are having better weather than we are!

On Friday, my cousin Danielle & her adorable son Dustin came over for a few hours and the dogs would NOT stop yapping/ barking loudly and incessantly. So, I locked the dogs in the bedroom which is also where Danielle had placed her diaper bag.

Don’t worry, Blue has YET to eat a diaper- but I’m sure that’s coming as well. Anyways, we were sitting in the living room and she offered Dustin some raisins. Then mentioned she had to GO GET THEM FROM MY ROOM. I died a bit because raisins are poison to dogs, as are grapes, avocado, pot & sugar free gum. All of which have previously sent my dogs to the emergency room.

Totally NOT her fault at all, but I know blue and if there is food that he can get to- he will. We leave the house and he empties the recycling to make damn sure NOTHING but recyclables are left. So, as soon as she said it I was like “crap- Blue ate them.”

Which, he did. She said it was probably about a cup of raisins. That is a bad scene.

So, I called the vet, because really, if I had to go to the ER for Blue, I would be effed. SO. MUCH. MONEY. Our vet suggested the ol’ hydrogen peroxide till they barf routine. I hate doing that because they get into stuff so much that they KNOW when the hydrogen peroxide or salt is coming and usually fight it.

I came up with the BEST IDEA THOUGH!

I poured HP into a water bowl & then added FRUIT JUICE. My dog is stupid. He was so stoked he drank the whole bowl. I promptly locked him in the bathroom for 20 minutes- came back to see the progress and HOLY CRAP! Barf EVERYWHEREEEE. And poop. SEXYYYY. But there was def more like 4 cups of raisins and I am glad I made him barf.

So, yeah- that’s the story. Totally gross and inappropriate, but barf is kinda awesome. I think so, anyhow.

He is a plumber. He owns his business and luckily stays busy enough for me to be a SAHM. BUT: What does he do when he returns home after a long day? Not much!

I don’t mind the cleaning and cooking and all that. I especially don’t mind because he doesn’t say anything when it goes undone for weeks on end until he goes to work one morning commando style and with no socks. THEN he requests the laundry get done. I cannot complain.

BUT BUT BUTTTTTT: My husband, DOES NOT plumb a darn thing in this house. My kitchen sink is clogged? Yeah, for MONTHS. My bathroom sink drain smells suspiciously like poo? He’ll get to it. My water heater that works 50% of the time? Yeah, after literally at LEAST SIX MONTHS of complaining that he needed to replace the thing- the water heater went out on CHRISTMAS!!

So, luckily, he IS a plumber and was able to rig some shiz to get us through the weekend- and is now replacing the water heater.

I was just sharing because A. I have been telling him this needed to be done for MONTHS and B. When people ask what my husband does for a living, and I tell them- they always say “oh, you’re so lucky! You must have a nice bathroom/kitchen/running water/someone to unclog the toilet!” And to that I say “NO FREAKING WAY!”

It is a literal LAW that whatever your husband does for a living he does not want to come home to continue doing it. Especially when that job includes manual labor for 10+ hours a day.

So, my water heater is being fixed- but at the last possible second at the WORST possible time, financially.

Gotta love it.